Okay, so hear me out. You ever have one of those weird, totally embarrassing thoughts that just *pops* into your head when you’re trying to go about your day? Like, I’ll be walking to class or sitting in a coffee shop, and suddenly, it’ll hit me: *Guys really like my butt.* They always do. It’s like the moment I step into a room, I can feel their eyes on it. And, okay, it’s flattering in a way? Like, I guess, I’m happy with the way I look. But then, in a split second, this other thought creeps in: *I poop from that same butt*. Like, what the heck? How does that make sense? Why is my butt considered this whole sexy thing, when it’s also the exact same part of my body that has to, you know, *eliminate waste*?
It’s honestly kind of mind-boggling. One minute, guys are complimenting me on how my jeans fit, saying things like, “You have such a nice shape!” or “You have a great ass!” And I get it, I mean, I like looking good too, and there’s something about that confidence that feels good. But then I’m left there thinking, *They have no idea what else happens down there.* And I really hope they never do. I mean, how can I be expected to feel sexy about the same part of my body that’s also, you know, responsible for all the *other* stuff? The stuff I’d prefer not to think about in public, let alone in front of a guy. It’s a little unsettling, to be honest.
The more I think about it, the weirder it gets. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but it seems like society has this really weird relationship with women’s bodies. Like, I’m supposed to be flattered by the attention, by the compliments, but at the same time, I can’t help feeling a little… exposed? I mean, it’s not like *I* asked for my butt to become this thing people are constantly staring at. It’s not like I wake up and say, “Today, I’m going to make my butt my best feature.” But it feels like, all of a sudden, every time I step out, it’s on display. Whether I like it or not.
And then, when I stop and think about it in a moment of *awareness*, it feels like I’m living in a strange paradox. Why does my butt get all this attention for looking good, but no one ever mentions what it’s *actually* doing behind the scenes? No one wants to acknowledge that my butt isn’t just for looking cute in leggings. It’s also for, well, doing stuff I’d much rather not talk about in front of anyone, let alone the cute guy who just complimented me on my “curves.”
Honestly, sometimes I’m in the bathroom, sitting there, doing my business, and I can’t help but think, *If only guys knew what my butt was doing right now.* Like, yeah, they’d probably be *way less* interested if they knew what was actually going on in the background. I mean, I’m just sitting there, hunched over, trying to get through the whole thing without making it *too* obvious that I’m, well, pooping. And the whole time, it’s like my brain’s doing this weird flip-flop between *sexy ass* and *getting rid of bodily waste*. It’s like, how do I reconcile those two things? They’re both happening in the same space at the same time, and it just feels so… *wrong*. Like, the same body part that looks good in high-waisted jeans is the one that’s making, let’s be honest, the grossest noises imaginable in the bathroom. And I’m just sitting there, praying that no one walks in while I’m in the middle of that—*please, no one talk about this ever*.
It’s like, I’m supposed to embrace the whole “sexy” side of it but ignore the fact that it’s the same area that *produces* the least sexy things imaginable. And trust me, it’s hard to feel hot when I’m aware of how my body is simultaneously an Instagram-worthy object of desire *and* a very, very real human machine that does things I’d rather not think about in public. I mean, really, when was the last time anyone talked about how *awkward* it is that my butt can be admired as this “sexy” thing when it also has a very, very unsexy function? And why does no one ever mention that? Is this something I should just pretend doesn’t happen?
Honestly, I feel like I’m walking around with this bizarre double life. Like, there’s the version of me that people see, who’s Instagram-ready and always trying to look cute in tight jeans or skirts, and then there’s the me who’s just trying to get through the day without thinking about the fact that—*yep*—my body is just a little too functional for comfort sometimes. And can we just talk about the awkwardness of knowing guys are looking at my butt, *and* knowing they have no idea what it’s doing behind the scenes? It’s like this secret, unspoken thing that makes me feel both self-conscious and strangely mortified.
I guess it’s just one of those things that feels super weird when you really start to think about it. Like, *why* does society get to define one part of my body as this “sexy” thing, while ignoring the reality that it’s also involved in some of the least glamorous parts of my human experience? The truth is, I’m not sure I ever *really* want to think about it. But at the same time, it’s hard to ignore when it feels like everyone else is turning my body into this one-dimensional object of desire—without considering all the *other* things it does.
So, I guess I’ll keep doing my best to ignore the weirdness of it all and just smile when people compliment my butt. But let’s be real: the next time I hear someone say something about how “great” it looks, I might just be inwardly cringing at the fact that they’re admiring the same part of me that I’d rather not think about in a, well, *different* context. It’s just one of those things I’ll never fully understand. But hey, life’s weird. I guess I’ll just roll with it… as long as no one asks about what happens in the bathroom.
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